Home learning has been interesting, to say the least. Many parents are working from home while their children are also schooled from home. That doesn’t sound so bad in theory, right? However, home-learning does not quite occupy the same amount of hours youngsters usually spend at school. During the last year, it has become pretty clear that to stay up with the grade level pace, students are expected to work many hours a day independently on assignments. Many students do not work well independently, give up easy, do not initiate seeking resources, and have a hard time keeping themselves motivated to do any work at all once the teacher signs off. One problem is that parents feel guilty and hang on to excuses. It’s easy to blame the pandemic “Oh, but he sits in front of the computer all day for school and then he has to do his assignments on there too?” “It’s too much for these kids!” Maybe it is, but as we say, “It is what it is!” and we are going to have to persevere and make the best of it. Remember, “When the going gets tough……..”. and “When life gives you lemons….. (I like the one that concludes with “we make Margaritas”, lol). Are parents unknowingly feeding a chronic lack of grit? Life is never just a walk in the park, people need to adjust, adapt, modify their goals, and go with the flow to find opportunities for growth. We all know that being exposed to situations where flexibility and stamina are needed is what builds character and trains perseverance. Isn’t that what we want to see in our children?
Numerous parents have discovered that their little angels have turned into moody and uncooperative demons and the expression, “I don’t know how teachers do it?” has been heard around the globe. I can tell you how we do it, we have high expectations and we don’t back down. We train students to get organized repeatedly and consistently, we teach them to be prepared for classes with materials by displaying a daily agenda, and we demand effort. We help students to reflect on their attempts and their results, and we discuss how to meet new goals and desired outcomes consistently and frequently. Kids try to wear us out too, but we stiffen our backs and do not let them get away with it. We have strict routines, and rules, and don’t take Sh..! We have expectations and immediate consequences for unwanted behaviors, and missing assignments. We take away recess, re-assign lunch and/or PE to catch up on unfinished work, send notices home, and schedule student,-parent-teacher meetings. No bribes, no rewards, just expectations, grades, encouragements, and acknowledgments. Feeding intrinsic motivation.
It may help that in class, many students feel the need to compare themselves to other students which can be motivating for some. A little peer pressure at times can work wonders. Additionally, a teacher’s “stink-eye” can also motivate most students to change undesired behavior. In general, kids misbehave in class plenty, refuse to do work, do work that is below their ability, and whine with the same excuses they give their parents. In the end, no matter what happens, if they want to succeed as scholars, in their careers, as friends, parents, bosses, or athletes, they need to be able to adjust to new situations, put their best efforts forth, and have the courage and strength to reinvent themselves.
I saw a note hanging on a teacher’s door the other day which said, “Character isn’t built by doing things that are easy, but by doing things that are hard!” and that is what it comes down to regardless of the environmental situation.
Because it is evident that “normal” life is not returning any time soon if ever, here are some ideas to get a better handle on your child’s home learning experience:
Preparation for Online Learning Success
- Discuss with your child the whole home-learning situation. The pros, the cons, the expectations, the daily commitment in hours, the independent effort, and the students’ progress and its implications (repeating the year?). Ask them about their worries, their fears, their frustrations, and express concern and empathy but make it clear it is what it is and they need to do their jobs (which is doing well in school and getting paid in grades) like you have to do your job to get paid in money!
- Make sure your child’s tools and resources are up to date, charged, and working properly. Not being able to log on, download, print, etc. is extremely frustrating and demotivating! I strongly suggest buying an inexpensive bl/wh printer (for school use only!) that communicates wirelessly with your child’s computer or laptop and some extra black ink and plenty of printer paper. A headset with a microphone is a must!
- Create a comfortable area with a small desk or table and good Internet reception. Ask the child for advice on how to design the workspace (within reason). The more children feel they are part of a process, have choices and input, the more likely they are to comply.
- Sign-in all necessary home-learning websites on your child’s device and save the usernames and passwords for easy access and create icons on the desktop.
- If your child is in third grade or higher, give him or her an alarm clock and tell them you expect them to wake up themselves and get ready for class. There should be an incentive or a consequence for not following this request. Like earning the right to watch a movie or a visit to the park.
- Train your child to be ready for class (meaning, they have eaten, drank, used the bathroom, are groomed and dressed, and ready to start the school day). Teach them punctuality and have the child seated at their desk 10 minutes before log in time. Check if all materials like pens, pencils (sharpened), eraser, line paper, scratch paper, notebook for taking notes, and graph paper for mathematics are ready to go in the working area.
- Do not allow your child to eat or drink during class and make sure their phones and other distracting items are locked away until after classes have ended.
- Laying on a bed or couch is not conducive to learning. Make sure your child’s body language is promoting alertness and focus by sitting up straight with both feet on the floor.
- Encourage your child to get up and move around between classes. There are some enjoyable silly-movement youtube videos that can help liven up the sedentary online learning experience.
- Last but not least, communicate with your child a lot. Listen to their complaints but also discuss the positives and point out there can be a balance. Share your own Pandemic related frustrations. Discuss your worries and concerns as a parent. We are all in this together. Promise each other you will do the very best that you can.